It’s Okay to Have Feelings

Growing up, I felt that my feelings were not paid attention to enough. It was always “Not right now, I’m working,” and this is where my workaholism was given free reign also. These days, I’m trying not to take workaholism as a thing, because I’m trying to deal with my feelings since addiction is a way to avoid your feelings by replacing accepting them with a poor substitute for validation. I try to stay away from people, I don’t want to act needy, but at the same time, I wish that I could say hey friend, let’s hang out. I’m too traumatized from my last close friendship going up in flames to a marriage nobody else amongst her friends approved of, since going to that bridal shower would have made me very ill. I’m still recovering from hearing about this friend marrying someone who is not good for her. I have many feelings about many different things, and I’m trying to cope with them. It is almost time to get a real therapist with real money.