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Gaslighting: What it Is/How to Fight It

September 2, 2018


Gaslighting is insidious in abusive relationships. It happens frequently to the point the victim can’t think straight. Some people like to blame the victim, telling the victim of gaslighting it is your fault. This happened in the 1945 movie “Gaslight” where a husband tries to make a wife crazy by telling her she’s not seeing the raising or lowering of the gaslights. Gaslighting is a huge abuse issue since the perpetrator wants the victim to feel that what happened is their fault. You have to be willing to be gaslit if the person doing it feels superior to you by warping your perceptions.



Growing up in the family that I did, I was gaslit almost daily by both of them. Gaslighting has made me doubt my own perceptions even as I decided that the envelope with my check was in the mail. I saw it in my head. I’m also dead-on when I find that the registration comes in the mail. I mean I can sense it before I open the mailbox. I almost see it in my head really. Gaslighting, however, makes you doubt your perceptions. I was always the wrong one. Why I was wrong, was a mystery to me. I wish I could trust myself in the present.


I mean gaslighting makes people anxious, as you are the wrong one in the interaction with the gaslighter. At work, this can be particularly insidious if your gaslighter is the boss. The boss tries to alter your perception of reality. This is what makes you feel funny. It is almost low-grade nausea. You do not feel sane around a person like this or having a relationship with somebody like this. I know who I can’t trust, and it is people who practice gaslighting.



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