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Why I Am Scared of Needles and Mania

February 15, 2020

I’m scared of needles. I have been terrified of needles my entire life. Hell, I realize I’m not the one pissed of at diabetes. That responsibility goes to irresponsible people in my family. Needles trigger my anxiety big time, because they pretty much mean that I freak out at the act of injecting myself. Since yesterday, I realized I can’t rant at diabetes while changing my infusion set. If I do that, it bends. If I feel a surge of violent rage at myself out of nowhere, it actually isn’t me, its other people who would stigmatize me. I now realize that diabetes is a huge nothing, but I can learn to control it. I’m not the one with sharp, violent rage toward it or myself for having it. This is something I have to set up a psychic shield around.

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