Hey, so Biden doesn’t think kids my age want to run for office does he? I’ve thought of that for years. My head has to be on straight. I’ve said it out loud but sexist members of my family think President is a man’s job. Sexist. People. In my family. Think this. Grr..
Take that-Biden.
https://theswamp.media/why-i-want-to-run-for-president
Thank the gods nobody has read it yet. I would be sworn in on a huge pile of every religious text there is, including but not limited to the Inferno of Dante.
The Perfect Copy is about a cop, named R.J. Salinger, who lives in Berkeley, in the year 2016 to the present. I wrote this science fictions story when I was in junior college or when I was at least 20-21. I need to expand this story into a short story collection, then I want to produce a television show with this idea. I’ve decided thanks to the Zephyr Self-help center, that I have to get an A.A. in film and television. For some reason, my San Francisco State transcript remarks that I do not have graduate school standing, but I finished the credits necessary for my Bachelor’s.
The Perfect Copy is about a female cop who deals with clones. The whole world is set up based on genetic engineering, people who have it, people who don’t, people who are clones, and people who aren’t clones. I wrote this around the time the entire human genome was sequenced, in 2003 ish when I took my first creative writing classes. I learned a lot in those classes. My story is about how R.J. Salinger live in the 21st century. I typed up this story word-for-word, but now I can’t find the file. I should be able to find the file, but I can’t.
My characters are about to go after their alien stepfather (a grey), who is trapped in a military installation. Alcira is about to use her abilities to mess with a guy’s head. As in, he’s going to get psychically manipulated but she’s anxious as everything because she fears misusing her abilities. Her sister is trying to reassure her in the car. They will successfully beak in to kidnap their Grey alien stepfather. They will take him back to where a ship will take him home. I don’t know what happens after that. Journey to Atlantis has to do with time travel, and actual Atlantis. I meant the Opening New Dimensions series to be six books, just like Frank Herbert’s Dune.
It is meant to be a story for girls, with a female heroine. I’m working on this story in my head before I open the file. It’s just that fiction feels blocked to me. I’m wondering why that is. I know that I feel I might have been cursed. But hey, if I’m ever going to make real money from writing, I’d better quit being lazy. I tried to submit my novella somewhere. They didn’t necessarily want it. I dislike writing under the gun when writing fiction. I can do it when I’m writing copy. The Internet magazine I work for has taught me how to deal with deadlines without getting paranoid. I’m grateful for the chance to teach myself.
This trilogy is an idea I’ve been floating around with for many years, since junior college. My blockages come from people criticizing my short stories, which I started writing back then, when I had untreated or improperly treated mental illness. Dark Dawn started off as a short story about an anthropology teacher who gets abducted by aliens. She then rethinks everything she has ever been taught in school about how we humans did things ourselves in the remote past. Then how was the Great Pyramid built, what was it, and why later on was it used as a tomb not a power plant as it had originally started off being used?
This work is meant as a trilogy because I want it this way. It popped into my head this way when I was in junior college. Why I haven’t started writing this is beyond me but it is a huge psychological block I have to get rid of. I had a muse in my tai chi class years ago, who helped me unblock myself. I have worked on a type of block schedule for all my writing. The block schedule helps keep me focused more or less but on Tuesdays I do not necessarily practice my fiction.
Fiction has become a bit of a struggle for me to write. I did manage a novella that I’m occasionally submitting. The thing is, DarkDawn is about the beginning of the chaos, because the story gets set in a parallel universe where aliens bomb the planet back to the Stone Age. In the second book she tries to stop this from happening. In Dark Dusk, they win as a way to prevent the dark stuff from happening since Ana comes back with advanced knowledge in her head. The aliens made a parallel universe in her head to see how she’d react. She is plugged into a machine that gives her the universe as well as full feeling in her head.
Eventually they let her go. She feels she has to warn the UFO people about this stuff coming true. In Dark Dusk, they manage to stop the alien invasion. But I’m not sure how, because my idea is still sketchy. I don’t know when it will come out in full. I had some dreams tonight about this very story idea as I remembered that my plan for this blog was to write about this idea today.
Nobody in my family takes much interest in my writing or my interests in general. They pretty much do not read my blog, so this article is quite safe to post. My parents did go to my martial arts tournaments but that’s about it. Nobody showed up to my track meets, not in high school and not in junior college. I have more self-discipline than people in my family though because I quit drinking as was covered in my last blog post. Childhood emotional neglect is defined as a parent’s failure to act on their child’s emotions, to take care of their feelings, or to notice that their kid has feelings in the first place.
Narcissists love accusing you of something that they actually did. We folks who have been through this have a specific type of struggle going on, or more precisely a set of struggles such as difficulty trusting other people. I have a huge problem relying on anybody, period, which is why when I had the staph infection I took myself to urgent care by bus on a weekday. At least the bus’s end of the line is at a prominent hospital out here.
People who have been through this kind of neglect feel disconnected, unfulfilled and empty. Parents fail their kids by not giving them structure or rules to live by, and heck; that is the story of my life. The emotionally neglected do not necessarily have a concrete memory to draw out but have multiple types of memory trauma lodged in their body. I’m trying to work on this stuff consciously. My body remembers feeling unsafe, which triggers me into feeling unsafe sometimes even when I know logically that I’m perfectly safe. Dr. Jonice Webb does write about 10 struggles emotionally neglected adults go through in her book, Running on Empty. One of my big fears in my adult life is getting close to people, close enough to have to rely on them.
I quit drinking from 2007-2010 as a process. My cousin was pointing out my dysfunctional behavior while on alcohol. I get girly, I get way too compliant, and I’m easily manipulated. This is why I realized that somebody with diabetes should not drink, period. I quit drinking. I’m an alcoholic with rapid cycling bipolar. Of course, I shouldn’t drink, what was I thinking when I turned 18 in 2000. I was thinking with messed up judgment because I was not on proper mediation, without seeing a proper psychiatrist, let alone having a proper diagnosis.
Here I was walking around drunk off my ass without anybody saying, gee drinking is bad for you. My family was treating me great while I was drinking. Then when I stopped, I was mistreated, and not taken seriously as an adult at all. Narcissistic parents resent the growth of their children. They get used to their child one way, then a change happens which makes them confused. I stopped drinking because I recognized it was bad for me, in particular my schizophrenia-ridden concentration issues. Drinking is just plain bad for you. It doesn’t help you at all. I quit drinking and I’m glad I stopped.
My starseed half is complicated. I’m an old soul but my human half is impatient about my knee injury, getting a job, and making real money. I worry about having enough money to pay for my own insurance. If I have endless money, paying for insurance will be easy. Starseeds are here to change the world. We are supposed to make sure that things change by voting for key political figures who will help change the world. Some of us keep a low profile. I have trouble with other starseeds who tell me not to take my medication. Those are even the sorts of pagans I avoid.
Gee, hm, you would think that I need my meds to be stable. I need to talk to another starseed sooner or later but you must respect the fact I take medication to freakin’ sleep at night. A starseed is a person who spent past lives on another planet, having memories of incarnating somewhere besides Earth. Yes, I have books to write on this. But there will be time enough for this. I’m done with Work 2 Future for now, so more therapy for me. I’m frustrated economically, so becoming a professional psychic reader may help this frustration a lot.
I didn’t know much about stress management growing up, since I should have had a child’s therapist in 6th grade but I only had the school nun instead. I have anxiety, many disorders, or at the very least I’m always anxious. I also have OCD, C-PTSD, and schizoaffective. It means as a rapid cycling bipolar that I had better keep my emotions in check. As a psychic with ignorance about stress management, I feel like I have to control my feelings to an extent because I cannot let my lack of skill spill onto someone around me. Being an empath, I have an influence on other people because of my talent. Stress management for some people means putting things in perspective.
Sometimes stress can make you feel helpless with nothing getting better since the bills or whatever else keeps coming. Stress is kept under control by taking charge of your thoughts, lifestyle, and your emotions. Thoughts need to be mostly positive, with specific ways of cutting the negative thoughts from your mind. I know that my thoughts control my reality. Some people interested in the psychic would say that your thoughts are 100% responsible for creating your reality. But we mentally ill folks know better since we have many messed up thoughts that do not come true. In particular, if you have OCD.
OCD is a wacky illness because you have to make sure the stove is off over and over again despite intellectually knowing that the stove is off. High stress could cause you cancer, and other illnesses. I made the choice to take medication for my schizoaffective because I realized that I had more control over my emotions this way. A balanced life means that you manage your time properly, while identifying all sources of stress in your life. If you deal with a stressful person, that person needs to be dumped.
Stress is an important part of accepting responsibility because of creating and maintaining your responsibility for YOUR life. Stress journals could help you keep track of what kinds of stress you are dealing with if you write down what is causing you stress. Work can cause me stress sometimes, because of the “what do other people think of me?” factor. I get confused about this. I wonder why I give it so much weight. I know to keep my mouth shut about my family, as I lead a drama-free life since they live in Spain.
Stress is best dealt with when you know your limits. I cannot go back to school until I figure out what my real-school academic limits are. I simply can’t overload myself as I’m risking going back to alcoholism and caffeine addiction. At the very least, I will go back to chocolate. Someone who causes stress in your life is someone to avoid. At the very least, people whom express their anger do not stress me out. It is those who do not express if something bothers them that bother me. Sometimes you have to drop tasks that do not allow you to say no.
I’m working on accepting things I cannot change. Connecting to friends could reduce stress give or take who you connect with and if they are positive influences on your life. Relaxation practices such as yoga do help me a lot. Yoga has helped me my entire life since I started practicing it. Managing time and delegating projects also help you with stress. Saying no to people who push you past your limits is something delicate. Reducing caffeine and sugar helps you relax and sleep better. Getting enough sleep also helps you cut back on stress. These days, I am getting enough sleep compared to my sleeping habits during the school year. Learning to reduce stress in the moment by breathing through stress is what will help you the most.
Works Cited
I just finished the business plan for this idea. Better tasting gummy-consistency glucose tablets need to be a thing as they aren’t out yet. The powdered kind of glucose tablets tastes nasty. All I have to do is go on Shark Tank to show the judges the way the old glucose tablets taste, and how newer, better, gummy-consistency glucose tablets work better. Candy is one way to bring your blood sugar up when low, but it is not that great of a method because you could over dose. Candy is simply an emergency measure, because glucose tablets do work better.
This morning, I woke up with my blood sugar at 36. To cope, I took four glucose tablets, and a yogurt. Then I was stable enough to make my morning eggs. My blood sugar has gone up since then. I’m busy writing up a storm today, as I want to get my work done since I feel motivated. My better tasting glucose tablets would make it easier for diabetics to get their blood sugar up. Juice works quickly but not fast enough. Glucose gel is a fast-acting treatment for type 1 diabetes low blood sugars. Low blood sugar is a side effect of using insulin.
Sometimes lows feel cleansing. Admittedly, sometimes having good control hinges on the occasional 90. Then again I have hypoglycemia unawareness. This means I do not always know I’m low. Yes, scary. I live by myself with this condition. I try my best to keep it together. Lows make one hungry, hungry enough to eat a lot, to eat like a pregnant woman or to clean out an entire refrigerator if delusional enough. Lows can make even non-schizoaffective type 1s temporarily delusional. This is why I want to invent a better tasting glucose tablet type.
iriavp 