Up until senior year I had chamomile tea to calm me down. That was it though, I didn’t even look into natural remedies. I didn’t think I needed medication. I was about to get SSI, when I was introduced to alcohol, which I realize is very bad for me also. Alcohol calmed me the frak down, big time, allowing me to center myself and to focus. It even helped me sleep. I realized I was in an environment that encouraged drinking. When I went dry, in 2010, I was with a therapist out of San Mateo, who also worked out of San Francisco where I went to school, having met her in college. I quit with her help, but I was hanging out with a pothead back then, without realizing that it was affecting me. When I dumped him, I realized I had better avoid people who smoke pot, which I have done.
Up until senior year I had chamomile tea to calm me down. That was it though, I didn’t even look into natural remedies. I didn’t think I needed medication. I was about to get SSI, when I was introduced to alcohol, which I realize is very bad for me also. Alcohol calmed me the frak down, big time, allowing me to center myself and to focus. It even helped me sleep. I realized I was in an environment that encouraged drinking. When I went dry, in 2010, I was with a therapist out of San Mateo, who also worked out of San Francisco where I went to school, having met her in college. I quit with her help, but I was hanging out with a pothead back then, without realizing that it was affecting me. When I dumped him, I realized I had better avoid people who smoke pot, which I have done.
Caffeine addiction is something I have seen in my own family, and in friends. My ex was a major addict, and so was I. I was drinking too much espresso in junior college just to function. It gave me pep, and pizzaz, which I have learned in the present to get from faking it until you make it, chocolate, or getting enough sleep. I can’t have chocolate because of Mr. hernia anyway. I’m trying to eat sugar products like baked goods rather than let myself go crazy craving chocolate, which I kind of am. Chocolate is a low grade dose of caffeine that my body can tolerate. I have no idea though why it makes me talkative, like I can stand socializing, because when not caffeine manic, I was an introvert who didn’t know about my schizoaffective at all at 20, and was a total sugar junkie besides, with bright red acne zits on my face from all the sugar I’d shock people with that I was eating.
For those of you who think four “antispsychotics” is too many, I will tell you what is and isn’t an antipsychotic, and why I feel I need them. I’m a fragile rapid cycler who is processing way too much trauma on my own, I’m trying to navigate this wildness in my head. I also have a lot of information rattling around in there, books, etc. and I need to keep my files organized if you will, since the brain is rather like a harddrive. So to my believing friends, I keep my files organized taking my medication. Buspar is antianxiety, I’m lucky I’m not allergic to it. Eschitalopram is an OCD medication and an antidepressant. My only two antipsychotics I’m on are Geodon and Lamictal. It is a blessing to get up and feel well every day compared to the way I used to feel. Real hell is having a mental illness without access to medications.
Works Cited
For those of you on other continents, yes, California is having a major fire incidences but some are getting better, The SCU Lightning Complex fire, and the LNU Lightning Complex fire are at 98% and 97% contained respectively. The North Complex Fire is at 39%, while the Creek fire is just at 16%. The CZU lightning complex fire is at 91%$, while the Bobcat fire is new at 6%. The Lake Fire is contained at 96%, while the Butte fire is at 97%, with the Valley Fire at 87%, the El Dorado fire is at 44%. The Shackleford Fire is new, and is at 30% containment. The Schoolhouse fire is thus 80% contained, with the Sperry Fire at 0% contained, while other possible fires are not labeled, and the entire West Coast doesn’t have the fires contained yet. The smoke in the air is always present, smoke has been around all day for weeks. I’m starting to have a sore throat from it. I’m astounded that people do not always wear masks even with smoke conditions, much less with coronavirus going around.
iriavp 