I want to try an open-mic night sometime. This is because I want to make my comedic debut. But you see, I do not like to be the center of attention. I’m kind of an introvert with an extrovert button. I lead a very quiet life but I speak out on my blog and on Facebook. I do not go to protests; I have my own way of doing things quietly underhanded. Open-mic night begins my career in comedy, which I’m free to pursue by now. I’ve always maintained my adult legal rights by taking my medication. I have endless material on several fronts.
I don’t want to get myself into trouble with ribald jokes though. I can’t say anything too controversial even though that may yet happen. I just love being in the now though. Open-mic night has to happen when I go to a coffee shop that has them in downtown San Jose. I need to get this done soon enough because I want to wow my audiences. Although the thing is, I’m feeling terrified about open-mic even if it is kept to 15 minutes. I do have a lot of experience with public performance, however, and I’m going to be able to keep up with open-mic night.
It will be interesting to get up on stage and perform. This is something I have never tried. The thing is, I’m nervous. I was wondering who may show up. I live in San Jose now, but I didn’t have the nerve to do open-mic night while I lived in Mountain View. What makes me think I have the nerve to do an open-mic night in San Jose? How funny am I? Some have said twice, in junior college, and State, that I’d be funny enough to be on Saturday Night Live. Somehow I want to try comedy to see where it gets me. In particular, if you get paid for performances. I just read that comedy can pay $18 an hour or $30,000 a year. Let’s see what happens. (https://www.theartcareerproject.com/careers/comedy/)
As an insulin pump user, I have perfect diabetes in my grasp. No more excuses. I’m trying my best to win the fight to sleep the whole night. Lately, I’ve managed to wake up at 7 a.m. every day for a week. At least I’m not waking up at 5:00 a.m., simply because I went to bed at 7, the first year I have lived by myself since college when I had roommates. I live on my own now though because I can’t stand roommates. I’d rather not deal with their energy grating on my energy, thus getting on my nerves.
I have to not have a middle of the night high blood sugar event. I’m very close to perfect in the afternoon. I’m close to having a day when I only bled six times instead of the usual ten, or even five times a day versus the usual ten. I’m just looking forward to winning this fight that I have waged war on since 2012 or earlier. College was awesome because I did sleep the whole night or at least almost the whole night, save that half a semester period that I wasn’t taking medication. I’m working on getting my life together such as getting a source of income going besides writing fiction, which I have to send out to other markets.
I also need to get painting supplies but my trip to Michael’s next week will feature getting a dream pillow kit. I may or may not have an amethyst in the house, which is another component of my dream spell. This is my final Greyschool.com assignment. I’m terribly stuck. I actually have one more essay to work on. My infusion set totally came out yesterday, as in the tape lost it’s sticky properties or didn’t originally have it. So I had to change my infusion set abruptly before going into the pool. Changing it in the afternoons is worth it because you get to save a lot of insulin as opposed to changing it in the morning. Today I’m not driving anywhere this Fourth of July because I have had strings of high blood sugar from the low. You eat to compensate the low, and that is why you wind up with a high blood sugar, from the munchies. Well, anyway, I am close to perfect diabetes, my blood sugars being high or not, I will nail it eventually.
From 5th grade to 12th grade, I had very good control over my diabetes. After about 12, I fought for my free will to make my own choices. Eventually, I outdid myself. This is still true today. I work hard at diabetes management. I have always had supernatural control even with the insulin pump. I’ve passed out from diabetes once in my life, in Chile. The circumstances that brought this on were my own stupidity and stuff that cannot be mentioned in public just yet. Since 2006, I have not passed out in 12 years. Count that people, 12 years out of 27.
This is a fabulous track record. Around the Ex, I made sure that I could keep my blood sugar under control. I have type-1 diabetes with no complications according to my medical records. My meds help me stay stable. All my treatments work together even if I’m on 10 medications. Some people may have issues with that but you know what? I’m stable. What matters more is the opinion of my religious community, and not anybody else. When they tell me good job, I believe it as opposed to the Ferengi who want me to fail.
I mean here is a psychic link where I hear the seething all the time. I like my meds, I like being healthy, and I certainly enjoy being stable. To not take medication for a mental health problem condemns the sufferer to constant pain. I mean I need my meds for simple things like going out to eat in a crowd, participating in my coven without getting wound up, driving and more. I need my medication to stay stable. I think some people in certain religious groups may not approve of this but it is necessary for my mental health. One memory of high school and I guarantee you I’m taking my medication. My insulin pump helps me afford my supernatural control. I’m a brittle diabetic in addition because I fluctuate at the slightest thing. Stress in particular which I’m trying to learn better management of. I get stressed easily and I’m trying to learn how to undo this.
I’m a type 1-diabetic, and I need to come up with some healing rituals. I’m trying to fix my calluses because they exist. I yell at them to leave my body but yet I’m hanging on to the energy of those calluses as well as my knee being stiff thing. I have an excuse not to travel, and to drive everywhere. I just talked to my insurance so they are looking for me to email my doctor and get a cane that way. To heal yourself, you can loudly channel your energy like I did to heal my boil in my mouth. It was there one minute, gone the next. I have never thought instantaneous healing on that level to be possible. I thought that was all science fiction.
Until it became science fact, that is because I mean one minute I’m using my tongue and wondering how the fuck am I going to treat this with salt water? To omfg, it’s gone. Wow. Just what deity up and healed me? How did I heal myself? Could I really heal my calluses instantaneously? I mean I’ve had bruises from my infusion set suddenly look less dark purple to black. I mean one minute it looks terrible, the next it heals. According to one endocrinologist I had, I can use my stomach indefinitely as an infusion site. This means I heal completely. I don’t use old sites that have a big mark on it. Since I’m half a brown person or a “half-breed,” my skin turns brown. I’m a minority anyway since I’m half Chilean and half Spanish-speaking white person. Yes, I pass for white.
Instant healing only happens in science fiction and fantasy books or TV shows. But maybe in the remote past, it was real. Somehow the power got diluted over time since not many people unless you’ve studied energy work, know how to instantly heal someone else or themselves. My gimpy knee has taken forever to heal. I mean I was already healed all the way under anesthesia’s proof but I was still stiff until I got Reiki on my knee.
If I had enough income, I’d go get Reiki elsewhere but sessions are expensive. I can do it for myself but some feel my mind is interfering with my knee. Or other people’s energy from their fear of me working and making money, essentially bucking the parental money stream. Yes, this scares the Ferengi. I suppose my fingers heal daily. I mean when I healed myself from that gross thing, I felt a heat enter my body from the crown or top of my head. There one minute, gone the next. I didn’t think that stuff was possible, period. You see-I’m a skeptic. Believers find that hard to take. Even with all my talent, I always look for proof. Proof is essential to the way I do things. I look for proof. I even tell people at the psychic hotline that they need to find proof and call me back.
Witchcraft has many different subset paths that stretch over many topics. Witchcraft is used in modern times for self-healing. We made a commitment while entering this life that some of us will not curse. I have broken this commitment since I was cursing for a while, because see, my curses are ineffective. As ineffective as they are, it means I cannot just curse people because I feel like since I cannot get myself to certain levels of rage. You really do get back what you send out. I mean I feel like I can’t make progress with my finances, so that’s why I’ve quit fiddling with grey magick in general.
Greyschool is an environment mostly found online, that teaches various aspects of magick. I have to finish my last two assignments for one class. I mean I’m trying to use more verbal aggression as opposed to cursing, which is more passive-aggressive anyway. I’ve come to realize that I’m as vicious as the next person. My curses do not work on narcissistic people who swim their brain in thoughts of “I’m perfect as I am nothing can hurt me, I know everything.” There is such thing as healthy narcissism, which means we respect other people’s boundaries.
People who are narcissistic however, have limited checks and balances on their behavior. This is why I have thought about it, and decided that my witchcraft practice needs to be channeled into more self-healing work. This consists of verbal instructions to my body to make calluses go away. I managed to heal myself of a nasty mouth boil. I just yelled at it to go away. That is how I discovered my healing power. It is how I survive type 1-diabetes daily. I can heal myself. This blog will teach the technique to others eventually.
I have come to realize that protection spells work just barely, but bindings or curses do not work. Bad things do not always happen to bad people. Some people seem to lead charmed lives when they never get caught for doing mean things to people. They feel they are above the law. These sorts of people are narcissistic. It is rare that I meet people who actually are normal enough not to be considered narcissistic since some people are anyway. It is hard to get somebody with integrity like me but somebody without has to eventually pay up. I curse because I don’t always see karmic payback happen to bad people.
Maybe you don’t know what karmic payback they will get. I feel like I revealed too much of myself to somebody who was taking advantage of me, whom I can never be friends with again. Our friendship lacked meaning to her. But anyway, that’s a conventional explanation since the metaphysical explanation involves this person being an overly needy psychic vampire who is an empath at least. This is how aspects of manipulating psychic energy work. Some people who are empathic have some defenses against it. But average, ordinary humans who can be brainwashed? They have no defenses.
It is irresponsible to not take medication when you know you need it. I take my responsibilities very seriously because of this angle. I’m trying to prove I’m capable of taking my medication on my own so anybody who tries to manipulate me into not taking my medication cannot succeed at doing this. My medication keeps the psychic stuff under control. Frankly, I’m pissed off at false friends right now. People who say they’re my friend and then prove they aren’t by disrespecting my boundaries through showing up at my house without hearing me out that I wasn’t feeling well enough to be around somebody at that time. If you aren’t coming over to fucking take care of me, then don’t come over.
That mischievous Cylon did this. She’s busy faking being normal, as well as manipulating her dosages of medication. Sure, some people sabotaged their supply but well, that’s when you get the cops involved. If your power is regulated with medication, this simply put, means that you will not be mean to people. Losing your temper all the time is not a show of force. Focus problems are fixed with medication. At least my writing makes sense now given I’m on the right medication and my schizophrenia is finally stable. Any false friend can just butt out already. My magick is my responsibility. Bindings do not work on people. If they want to make irrational decisions, then fine. Power has to be regulated. I turn really mean when I’m manic anyway. I say mean, snarky things. The bottom line is I take my meds. Dumb people, do not ask anybody on anything chemical to stop taking the chemicals. That is rude. Accept their defaults and move on.
I feel blocked about getting money. Of course, witchcraft is another subject altogether but I feel like my magicks do not work very well. Divine protection works since my deities tell me to take my medication. I used to have oppositional defiant disorder as a child, but apparently, I’ve outgrown it since I stick to my various regimens. I do not defy my doctor, ever since that could frankly kill me. I want to make more money than I have, at some work from home job, which is why I got myself a website for that other virtual assistant website I’m a member of.
My job situation may have a metaphysical origin, which has to do with a family member’s ill will towards me. I’m not saying who it is, but I can feel their seething rage against my success. No amount of therapy helps this person. I can’t write about them directly. For the last five years, when I was with my ticket to work agency, this person was sabotaging me. My knee injury is a result of lack of calcium as well as my own clumsiness without respecting my feet’s natural pigeon-toed way of being.
This is why I’m taking to updating my blog three times a day. Yes, this may be a bit extreme but my afternoon post will be about witchcraft. There is a reason I added a category such as burnt at the stake. I am trying to make money off of websites that hire people to write articles, as well as freelance writing in general. Vocal. Media may yet make significant income as I get social security income but I do not get income from certain people. But anyway, this is why I’m making a huge effort with my blog to make myself $500 from traffic, and I have no idea how much a WordPress blog could make anyway. Assuming I update my blog three times a day, write for Textbroker, and in general, not touch my money for like weeks on end since I go to the food bank these days. I’m going to try to write a huge essay for a website that is having an essay contest about the problems our world is facing. I have an outline ready. I need extra income from somewhere besides studies I’m going to. I’m a very functional person for dealing with what I deal with.
iriavp 